Grazia Young Fashion Awards

The Grazia (A guy friend pronounced it as grey-zee-ya and that’s how I’ve saved his number.) Young Fashion Awards were held and the, seemingly, fashionable people of the industry were in attendance.

Sonam is all the coolest brands

Sonam in all the coolest brands

Sonam Kapoor, as always, wore all of Paris Fashion Week. That’s a Jean Paul Gaultier suit, a Chanel bag, a Givenchy necklace and Alexander McQueen shoes. Even if she wanted to go all androgyny on us she could have had her person take the jacket in an inch or two.

In Nikhil Thampi

Esha Gupta in Nikhil Thampi

I always wonder about innerwear whenever I see a dress with such a high slit. Going commando might be too risky so do they wear a thong with sides that go really high or is there a stick on silicone underwear that holds everything in place like bras do? So many questions such little importance. In all this, I almost missed the gorgeous zipper detailing on the thigh.

Wearing Namrata Joshipura

Wearing Namrata Joshipura

I know that as an, allegedly, self-actualised woman I am supposed to be comfortable in my own skin but Lisa Haydon’s sheer perfection is making that very difficult. She just makes the rest of us look like dog shit.

In a Vivienne Westwood dress

In a Vivienne Westwood dress

That’s a supremely cute dress. Richa Chadda does not do cute. She should give it a shot more often, though. Also, she could try an expression that’s not one of cold impatience.

In In Farah Sanjana

In Farah Sanjana

Priyanka Bose’s (Johnny Gaddaar, Guzaarish) maxi is so far whacked-out that I might just like it. Incidentally, my father came back with a similar image when he went to see the flamingos at Sewri.

Anushka Manchanda in Anand Bhushan

Anushka Manchanda in Anand Bhushan

It was awfully quiet this weekend near my house. Now I know why.  The guys in my wadi could not play their game of volleyball because they could not find their net.

In Pankaj and Nidhi

In Pankaj and Nidhi

The dress is perfect and age-appropriate and weather-appropriate on Shraddha Kapoor. It’s the styling that falters a little. A black clutch with nude shoes and nude-r lips? What happened to good old fuchsia?

A reminder in case we forget the real issues in life

A reminder in case we forget the real issues in life

Tisca Chopra’s hair is playing spoilsport so you can’t clearly read what’s written. It reads ‘#Selfie’ and it’s by the brand Huemn. So, get this – a design house designed a t-shirt with a print that reads #Selfie (which is what Anuya does all the time when she is not thinking about taking a selfie) and Tisca, who seems like an intelligent person, chose to wear it. Willingly.

Aditi Rao Hydari in Gauri & Nainika and a Manish Arora statement neckpiece   

Aditi Rao Hydari in Gauri & Nainika and a Manish Arora statement neckpiece

Don’t be deceived, dear people. That is no gown. It’s a draped jumpsuit. If a jumpsuit is going to such lengths to camouflage its true identity, is it not better off as a gown?

Anjana Sukhani

Anjana Sukhani

The blouse would make Silk Smitha very proud and her pants are dying to be worn by Aladdin. But seriously, what is going on here? Are her pants trying to run away from the horror of the top starting with the crotch? Or her top is so grossed out by the pants that it has physically recoiled from the waistband? Only her shoes seem content in their oblivion.

Poorna Jagannathan in Gaurav Gupta

Poorna Jagannathan in Gaurav Gupta

Lamé in small doses is something I can handle but give it to me in an entire gown, draped over a few times and I’m going to want to put it through the shredder.

Sonal Chauhan in a Nikasha Lulla monstrosity

Sonal Chauhan in a Nishka Lulla monstrosity

Now this one just wants to make me jump with joy… off a cliff. Quick question. Nishka Lulla and Sonal Chauhan, should I hand you the gun or will you guys take care of this yourselves?

Bollywood's future

Bollywood’s future

When I saw this image I was like, “Wow! Someone is actually doing the whole princess thing in public and not just the demure Kate Middleton kind but the actual tiara and gown variety and that too in Bombay.” And then I looked closer and saw that these were the Femina Miss India winners and they HAVE to dress like this until they sign their first Bollywood film. So yeah, thanks for shattering my hopes, ladies.

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IIFA Q – Part 2

Sophie Choudry

Sophie Choudry, that’s actually a nice gown but nobody cares. Seriously, why is she even issued a passport?

Sridevi

It’s great to see Sridevi not limiting herself to saris just because this is her ‘second innings’. Yet, I think she’s always a step away from getting it pitch perfect. There’s nothing wrong with this look. It’s a nice enough gown and fits her well but I don’t know. Is it the hair? Does she look a little disproportionate?

Sridevi1

It’s more pronounced here. Her bust just does not seem in keeping with the rest of her body.

Anushka sharma

Anushka Sharma’s bustline, on the other hand, is not doing its job well. Woman, eat something so you can grow a pair. Eat a pear even. Stop going from skinny to skinnier. Also, I hate your hair. Go bald and wait for it to grow out.

Vidya Balan

It’s no longer funny. Just sad. Very sad. It will never get better, will it?

Diana Penty

Diana Penty, you’re pretty and young. Wear a dress. Vaccinate yourself against Vidyabalansari-itis.

UPDATE: I’m slacking or am losing my eyesight or simply my mind. That’s not Diana Penty. It’s Pooja Kumar (Thanks Anj for pointing that out). She was in Vishwaroopam. You really can’t trust the internet these days. Still, darling, put on a dress.

Divya Dutta

Now, I don’t mind someone like Divya Dutta in a sari. I just have a problem when she looks like a cross dressing Aamir Khan.

Neha Dhupia

If you’ve not noticed, Neha Dhupia and we have a love-hate relationship. This might not be not her best work but I’m going to give it to her. Just because it stands out in the sea of gowns and saris. It’s very high-priestess-of-the-pantheon but I’m not going to speak ill of it. I’m not. Maybe… NO!

Lisa Haydon

Sigh. I’m going to kill myself by drowning in that pattern. Thanks a lot, Lisa Haydon. I feel so good about myself now.

Deepika Padukone

Ditto Deepika. My neck is thicker than her exposed thigh. Whatever. I’m going to console myself with the fact that her ‘Tamilian’ accent in Chennai Express is the film’s comic relief.