Grazia Young Fashion Awards

The Grazia (A guy friend pronounced it as grey-zee-ya and that’s how I’ve saved his number.) Young Fashion Awards were held and the, seemingly, fashionable people of the industry were in attendance.

Sonam is all the coolest brands

Sonam in all the coolest brands

Sonam Kapoor, as always, wore all of Paris Fashion Week. That’s a Jean Paul Gaultier suit, a Chanel bag, a Givenchy necklace and Alexander McQueen shoes. Even if she wanted to go all androgyny on us she could have had her person take the jacket in an inch or two.

In Nikhil Thampi

Esha Gupta in Nikhil Thampi

I always wonder about innerwear whenever I see a dress with such a high slit. Going commando might be too risky so do they wear a thong with sides that go really high or is there a stick on silicone underwear that holds everything in place like bras do? So many questions such little importance. In all this, I almost missed the gorgeous zipper detailing on the thigh.

Wearing Namrata Joshipura

Wearing Namrata Joshipura

I know that as an, allegedly, self-actualised woman I am supposed to be comfortable in my own skin but Lisa Haydon’s sheer perfection is making that very difficult. She just makes the rest of us look like dog shit.

In a Vivienne Westwood dress

In a Vivienne Westwood dress

That’s a supremely cute dress. Richa Chadda does not do cute. She should give it a shot more often, though. Also, she could try an expression that’s not one of cold impatience.

In In Farah Sanjana

In Farah Sanjana

Priyanka Bose’s (Johnny Gaddaar, Guzaarish) maxi is so far whacked-out that I might just like it. Incidentally, my father came back with a similar image when he went to see the flamingos at Sewri.

Anushka Manchanda in Anand Bhushan

Anushka Manchanda in Anand Bhushan

It was awfully quiet this weekend near my house. Now I know why.  The guys in my wadi could not play their game of volleyball because they could not find their net.

In Pankaj and Nidhi

In Pankaj and Nidhi

The dress is perfect and age-appropriate and weather-appropriate on Shraddha Kapoor. It’s the styling that falters a little. A black clutch with nude shoes and nude-r lips? What happened to good old fuchsia?

A reminder in case we forget the real issues in life

A reminder in case we forget the real issues in life

Tisca Chopra’s hair is playing spoilsport so you can’t clearly read what’s written. It reads ‘#Selfie’ and it’s by the brand Huemn. So, get this – a design house designed a t-shirt with a print that reads #Selfie (which is what Anuya does all the time when she is not thinking about taking a selfie) and Tisca, who seems like an intelligent person, chose to wear it. Willingly.

Aditi Rao Hydari in Gauri & Nainika and a Manish Arora statement neckpiece   

Aditi Rao Hydari in Gauri & Nainika and a Manish Arora statement neckpiece

Don’t be deceived, dear people. That is no gown. It’s a draped jumpsuit. If a jumpsuit is going to such lengths to camouflage its true identity, is it not better off as a gown?

Anjana Sukhani

Anjana Sukhani

The blouse would make Silk Smitha very proud and her pants are dying to be worn by Aladdin. But seriously, what is going on here? Are her pants trying to run away from the horror of the top starting with the crotch? Or her top is so grossed out by the pants that it has physically recoiled from the waistband? Only her shoes seem content in their oblivion.

Poorna Jagannathan in Gaurav Gupta

Poorna Jagannathan in Gaurav Gupta

Lamé in small doses is something I can handle but give it to me in an entire gown, draped over a few times and I’m going to want to put it through the shredder.

Sonal Chauhan in a Nikasha Lulla monstrosity

Sonal Chauhan in a Nishka Lulla monstrosity

Now this one just wants to make me jump with joy… off a cliff. Quick question. Nishka Lulla and Sonal Chauhan, should I hand you the gun or will you guys take care of this yourselves?

Bollywood's future

Bollywood’s future

When I saw this image I was like, “Wow! Someone is actually doing the whole princess thing in public and not just the demure Kate Middleton kind but the actual tiara and gown variety and that too in Bombay.” And then I looked closer and saw that these were the Femina Miss India winners and they HAVE to dress like this until they sign their first Bollywood film. So yeah, thanks for shattering my hopes, ladies.

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Aankho dekhi

Kajol

Kajol is doing the right thing by applauding herself. She deserves it. The loose Zara shirt might seem dowdy but I think she wears it well. This look also makes it clear that Spring is here which most of us refer to as, ‘God, why is it so hot?’

She could have discarded the necklace (into my jholi, please) and worn earrings instead. But I do like the sparkly sandals. That’s my only note on them. That I like, like them.

Kajol eyebrows

I too want to walk around with never having to thread my eyebrows and pass it off as a feminist statement against the idea of beauty perpetrated by society. It’s just that I fear I’ll be a social reject.

Filmfare nominations orgy

Filmfare held a nomination bash to celebrate the nominees (duh!) after which the actual awards function will take place followed by an after-party and all the festivities will be capped off with a roaring party for all the losers, hosted by Vivek Oberoi, because have you seen Krrish 3?

Sonam Kapoor in Anushka Khanna

Sonam Kapoor in Anushka Khanna

I guess all of you raised your hands high enough and waved them frantically enough because here she is.

Aditi Rao Hydari

Aditi Rao Hydari

That’s a fancy sailor’s uniform, miss. What oil rig you work at?

Wearing a Pankaj & Nidhi dress

Wearing a Pankaj & Nidhi dress

Does Deepika Padukone know there is a leaking nib on her crotch? Maybe Ranveer can clean it up with his suit. That’s the only good use of it that I can think of.

In my grandfather's suit

In my grandfather’s suit

Yes, Ranveer Singh, we get it. You are allegedly Deepika’s man and hence, in your head, have arrived. Which absolves you from having to make an effort. But the fact that she does make an effort ought to be a telling sign.

Richa Chadda

Richa Chadda

Like most times, my foot has come back to shove itself into my mouth. I take back everything I said about ‘some’ people not being able to pull-off gowns well. Because something is being pulled somewhere within that gown.

In an Alexander McQueen gown

In an Alexander McQueen gown

Ah! We’ve all been young and stupid but have managed to come out unscathed. I suppose what does not kill you only makes you more skeptical. It’s only Alia Bhatt’s youth that lets her pull off the look with minimal makeup and accessories.

Divya Dutta

Divya Dutta

Ok, so maybe she does not need to drown this particular attire but she still needs to take a little vaccy.

In a Shivan & Narresh sari

Huma Qureshi in a Shivan & Narresh sari

The drape of the gown (which actually is a sari that her stylist transformed into a gown) gives me the feeling that she’s going to get on her knees and start scrubbing the floors while asking me to increase her paggar.

Jacqueline Fernandez in Emilio Pucci and in your dreams, sucker!

Jacqueline Fernandez in Emilio Pucci and in your dreams, sucker!

Now, on the other hand… this one on her knees…. I’m going to stop now. My family reads this blog.

Kalki Koechlin in Gaurav Gupta

Kalki Koechlin in Gaurav Gupta

I guess if you must go classy and all I-don’t-care-that-I’m-going-through-a-divorce-with-someone-who-pioneered-the-new-wave-of-Indian-cinema, this is the best way to dress. Sassy yet elegant. Making an effort but not too much of it.

Nimrat Kaur in an Anand Kabra web print gown

Nimrat Kaur in an Anand Kabra web print gown

This ensemble comes to you from the House of Spiderman. If you look closely at the intricate webbing, it’s an ode to Peter Parker’s superpowers and the boxy fit… that’s just a bad fit.

In a jhagmag Namrata Joshipura suit

In a jhagmag Namrata Joshipura suit

Shruti Hassan attended as a Sindhi businessman on the verge of a breakthrough deal.

Sophie Choudry in a Pankaj & Nidhi jacket

Wearing a Pankaj & Nidhi jacket

Sophie Choudary borrowed P.C. Sorcar’s coat and managed to make it look fashionable.

Screen Awards red carpet

The Screen Awards took place and we all held our breath just waiting to know who went home with the coveted trophy. But when it comes to the telecast, we don’t have a seven second delay but more like a seven week delay. So you will have to wait a little longer to know the winners. Or you could just Google it. Whatever.

Abhay Deol and Preeti Desai

Abhay Deol and Preeti Desai in a Bare in Black gown

This couples’ tanning thing really works. A little too well.

Adhuna and Farhan Akhtar

Adhuna and Farhan Akhtar

I love Adhuna’s quirky sense of style. It’s like her way of rebelling against the ‘star-wife’ label. More power to you, girl. And that is how you wear a velvet waistcoat with Jodhpur-ish pants.

Aditi Rao Hydari in Harsh Harsh

Aditi Rao Hydari in Harsh Harsh

This needs something more happening. It all seems very flat and sort of like a snorefest.

Anjana Sukhani

Anjana Sukhani

Dude, is that a full and final velvet gown!? Talk about subtle use of fabric.

Bipasha Basu in Manish Malhotra

Bipasha Basu in Manish Malhotra

And that is how you wear velvet and an anarkali. In small doses and with less ghera, respectively. She really is looking good, no? Maybe marriage is the answer.

Boman Irani

Boman Irani

Yes, I will shake your hand but only because you are awesome.

Chitrangda Singh in Dior

Chitrangda Singh in Dior

If her last look was all about drama this is a little anticlimatic. Maybe another colour or a more glamorous hairstyle would have worked. But don’t worry, Chitrangda, the world (my amma and I) still loves you.

Deepika Padukone in Alexander McQueen

Deepika Padukone in Alexander McQueen

I suspect this one has gone a little wrong. I can’t point out why exactly. But feel is not coming. Like kuch kuch nahi hota hai when I see this gown. Could it be because Kate Hudson wore it to the Golden Globes LAST YEAR?

Divya Dutta

Divya Dutta

Take a beach holiday, woman and go drown that attire while you are at it.

Yo Yo Honey Singh

Yo Yo Honey Singh

He is making some very rude gestures but given the nature of his lyrics I should not be surprised.

Huma Qureshi

Huma Qureshi in Nikhil Thampi

Yes, the sun really does shine out of Huma Qureshi’s ear. Even Kalki Koechlin seems to think so…

Kalki in Nikhil Thampi

Kalki in Nikhil Thampi too

We get it. Huma is not responsible for Kalki’s divorce. You guys are the best of friends and you, Kalki, even helped Huma into that earpiece type-thingy. That ornament has a legitimate name but I’ve forgotten it. And I refuse to Google it since the Internet and I are currently in a complicated relationship.

This is one of Huma’s better looks. The dress fits her curves well and for once her hair is doing good things. But I’m thinking I should just give up on cribbing whenever people bastardise the sari. I can see Kalki’s leg. Should she not be wearing a petticoat underneath? My grandmother would not approve.

Juhi Chawla

Juhi Chawla

Why is she still promoting Son of Sardar?

In Shantanu & Nikhil

In Shantanu & Nikhil

No, no, no. Kajol, don’t fall back into your old trap. You were doing so well. This look seems so closed-up and nun-like. Unless… she is trying to cover a big old hickey. That’s one expensive way of doing it, if you ask me. Just paste on a bandage next time.

In Ranna Gill

In Ranna Gill

Look who’s back! And I have nothing unpleasant to say about Neha Dhupia. Except maybe… actually, no. But, I do want to wake up next to that cuff every morning and bring it breakfast in bed.

Nimrat Kaur

Nimrat Kaur

I’m loving the hint of boobies, sorry décolletage and the hair pulled away to show them off. Yet, I’m unsure of the puffed sleeves.

Ranveer Singh

Ranveer Singh

The velvet jacket with the waistcoat seems a bit much. Like it was initially a three-piece tux, but since he is Ranveer Singh and eccentric and all that, his stylist chose the blue jacket.

Wearing Innana by Monica & Karishma

Wearing Monica & Karishma

Do you think it’s just that some people can’t pull-off gowns as well as others can? There really is nothing horrifyingly wrong with the look, apart from the fact that the pattern overwhelms and the stylist should have put her hair up. As in Richa Chadda’s.

Sona Mohapatra

Sona Mohapatra

This is how Anarkali (the person, not the trend) must have looked and felt like when the last brick was laid.

In an Amit GT gown

In an Amit GT gown

I don’t know what Sonakshi Sinha or her stylist have been smoking but pat yourselves on the back and roll another one.

In Gaurav Gupta

In Gaurav Gupta

This dress on Shruti Hassan reminds me of a cold night at the graveyard. Let me hasten to assure you that Shruti does not look like the undead, far from it, but something about the blue and black and net gives me an eerie feeling.

In Amritraj Bora

In Amritraj Bora showing way too much of her Boras

As does this one on Sonal Chauhan. Somewhere a koli has lost the day’s catch.

In a Manish Malhotra sari

In a Manish Malhotra sari

Who sends her invites and why? At least Sophie Chaudhary has the decency to dress well.

PS: Raise your hand if you are missing Sonam Kapoor.

PeeCee at the GGA

Looks like Priyanka Chopra is taking her Hollywood singing career seriously. She attended the 71st Annual Golden Globes or its after-party (nobody is telling me for sure. Come on, Internet) but I can’t seem to find out why. If you guys hear something, do let us know. I’m serious. I’m really disappointed with the Internet. It can give me 27 signs why you are pathetically undateable and be spot on but it cannot inform me, with certainty, about Priyanka’s whereabouts.

Jewellery by Genevieve Jones

Jewellery by Genevieve Jones

The Bibhu Mohapatra tea-length dress seems a little less formal for the event where gowns rule the roost. This is not to say that it’s out of place. Many have worn this length or even shorter at the Globes. It’s less formal than the Oscars so I guess it works. The sequins add a much needed sparkle to the grey palette but it’s the neckline that draws all the attention. The detailing at the bottom lends a quirky touch. My only issue is with the hair. An updo, one away from the neckline, would have worked better.

Sandals by Oscar Tiye and jewellery by Genevieve Jones

Shoes by Oscar Tiye and jewellery by Genevieve Jones

For the CAA Golden Globes party, which is a pre-Golden Globes party (how does Hollywood get any work done around this time?) she wore this Burberry number. It’s a gorgeous colour and makes me believe that everything is right with the world. The sandals, however, with their tribal-esque design, add spunk to the serene look. All this is topped off with a jacket, a funky hairdo that Jared Leto would be proud of and some jewels that could rid a small nation of debt.

So, score for Priyanka at the Globes, for whatever reason she is there.

Possibly my worst nightmare

Neha Dhupia, Esha Gupta, Chitrangda Singh

There is something extremely disturbing about grown women shaving themselves in public with all the world’s media capturing it. It’s the worst concept for a reality show. Which means it will have the highest TRPs. No, but seriously. What is HAPPENING here? I understand they are endorsing a razor and are only demonstrating its best features. So by that logic what can we expect when actors decide to endorse sanitary napkins or condoms?

In DRVV by Dhruv Kapur separates and a shirt from Express

In DRVV by Dhruv Kapur separates and a shirt from Express

Neha Dhupia’s kinky boss gave her the day off to attend the event. That is the only explanation for the fact that she’s dressed like the receptionist at a porn magazine.

In Manish Arora with Amrapali earrings

In Manish Arora with Amrapali earrings

Esha Gupta’s dress is cute barring the small issue of bells hanging from her tits and crotch. But her overall look with the orange shoes is nice.

Wearing Zara with Christian Louboutin heels

Wearing Zara with Christian Louboutin heels

The white of the sheath dress works great against Chitrangda Singh’s dusky skin. I’m glad she refuses to endorse fairness creams. Also, I might want to adopt those navy beaded Louboutins and raise them as my own.

Oh so blue

Anushka Sharma – where has she been of late? – popped up to promote a whitening-blemish reducing-fragrance laced-world saving-poverty curing product that she’s the brand ambassador of.

In Oh My Love. As in "Oh My Love! What is she wearing!?"

In Oh My Love. As in “Oh My Love! What is she wearing!?”

The colour is actually nice on her and she carries the thigh-high slit well. The fit of the top-half is a little sloppy. Come on Anushka’s stylist, give her some definition. The lack of accessories and poorly-styled hair are not helping either. The shoes too lack funk.

Anushka Sharma1

The event was actually to announce the winners of a contest titled ‘Flaunt Your Back’ and that Anushka did. But where is the shape in the bottom-half?

Anushka was quoted as saying, “The contest has been amazing. The fact that you are encouraging women to be themselves and be confident is something that I vouch for.” This from a woman who endorses whitening everything. Sorry, cell repair.

Anushka Sharma

“You! Yes, you. My stylist. Are fired.”

Colour chameleon

Looks like all those heroines who pranced around in high waist baggy jeans and poofy pink frocks in the ’80s and ’90s are making up for it by looking stunning in the new millennium. Madhuri Dixit, Karisma Kapoor, Juhi Chawla, Sridevi and Kajol are essentially flipping the bird at the fashion gods every time they step out in public. Well, most times.

In AM:PM

In AM:PM

Kajol lent her support to a good cause in this feminine number. It’s nice that the bottom half has some sort of definition otherwise the dress was in grave danger of looking like Ebenezer Scrooge’s night gown. While the colour is great, the tan pumps and gold neckpiece make it all too monochromatic. A brighter pair of shoes might have worked. But I love me some side braid and now that a messy plait is in I can officially stop searching for my comb.

Kajol

Kajol did a 360 in this Quirk Box jumpsuit – an unusual yet interesting choice for her. It’s colourful and how. I’m so overwhelmed by the happiness and well… quirkiness of the ensemble that I’m not even noticing that it’s a jumpsuit and that her massive handbag has nothing to do with the overall look.

Krrish 3 trailer

I watched the trailer of the mathematically incorrect Krrish 3 and man did that thing look stunning. I especially loved the bit where after the plane flies over an under construction building Krrish’s feet thump down on the pillar. Amazingly done.  The effects, the action… everything looked brilliant…and very familiar. Let’s break it down.

superman

Krrish lifts up a building (the Internet’s not throwing up the desired image) and I’m guessing saves an architectural gem in the bargain. If Superman can do some heavy lifting so can this Greek God. I know Krrish has superhuman strength but he could have expressed it in another fashion. Perhaps stopped a tsunami or filled Bombay’s potholes in a day.

krrish 3 kaya

Kangana Ranaut plays villain Kaya. While she looks great she also comes across as a hybrid of Catwoman, an anime warrior chick and the Tomb Raider. They could have designed a better costume for a female supervillain than a black bodysuit. I’m not saying put her in a sari or sharara. Unless she’s doing an item number.

krrish 3 item song

Speaking of which. No superhero film is complete without the hero and love interest prancing about.

medusa1

Black widow

That’s either Medusa or the Black Widow. Either way it’s not original.

Villiansilversurfer

The Silver Surfer’s been there done that and he had a flying surfboard. None of this walking crap for him.

Toad

toad1

Seriously, the Toad from the X-Men? Seriously!? Rakesh Roshan, go ahead, have a guy with Adamantium claws. We’ll all applaud your novel idea.

Hrithik wig

After investing so much in the special effects you’d think they could have at least given Hrithik a decent wig.  Also look at the trailer closely and you’ll see a strategically placed Bournvita dabba. Now we know his shakti ka raaz.

Kangana in a Burberry Brit dress and Gucci belt and tweed pumps

Kangana in a Burberry Brit dress and Gucci belt and tweed pumps

For the trailer launch, Kangana wore a sweetheart neckline, a lot like her supervillain costume. But let me tell you there is nothing sweet about the gorgeous cleavage on display. It’s sexy as hell and she knows it. What Hrithik has on is rather basic but that just adds to his appeal. He looks the perfect balance of I-don’t-care-enough-to-make-an-effort-but-I-can-still-melt-your-panties. In his few-inches-short jacket, Vivek Oberoi just seems happy that finally he can star in something other than his own fantasies.

Deepika does double duty

Deepika Femina

Femina is still flogging the 100 years of cinema horse with its latest special edition cover. The gatefold opens to reveal three more Deepikas. That, right there, is many a people’s wet dream. She looks stunning, no doubt. Unlike Ranbir Kapoor I’d actually pick her over Katrina Kaif solely based on her choice of attires. But, somehow, I don’t think that was his prime criteria. Katrina is like milk chocolate – all white and single-flavoured but Deepika seems like dark chocolate with hazelnut – layered with surprises thrown in. This assessment refers to their outfits and has nothing to do with them personally or professionally because a) I don’t hang with them on a daily basis or like ever and b) Their combined professional talent does not keep me interested on a daily basis or EVER.

Hold on, why did I start talking about Katrina? Back to the cover. As an ode to Bollywood, Deepika donned five different looks depicting five different heroines and hence five different facets of Bollywood. The first one is a Cocktail inspired Zara look with crazy ass Steve Madden shoes. The busy metallic skirt is beautifully offset by the basic grey, slouchy top. Next she wears a Sabyasachi lehenga (like that was not obvious) paying homage to Umrao Jaan. It’s all you’d expect from a Sabyasachi lehenga. Nothing more, nothing less.

Deepika Femina 1

Zeenat Aman gets channelled in a Nikhil Thampi ensemble. The exaggerated sleeves look great on a magazine cover but I’m wondering about the practicality of having them drag along the dance floor. Deepika does a Mumtaz in a Ritu Kumar sari and blouse. I love the high neck blouse and the plain sari with the pouf styled to perfection. The final and, possibly my favourite, is the Helen look. The Rohit Gandhi + Rahul Khanna dress captures Helen’s peek-a-boo style so well as does the I’m-fresh-off-a-romp-in-the-hay hair. And I’d totally pledge my soul to the devil for those Christian Louboutins.

I like that all the ensembles have a soft, almost earthy colour palette and even though the looks hark back to an era gone by they still have a modern touch to them. Stylist Allia Al Rufai and hair and makeup artiste Anil Chinappa have done a great job.

But my grouse is not so much with the look and feel of the cover but with the concept itself. The edit team could have come up something a little more challenging than have a contemporary heroine play dress with a makeup room as the backdrop. It’s feels like this was the first idea they had and they just ran with it. It’s the 100 years of leading ladies, so much more could have been done. They took their tagline ‘For all the women you are’ and literally translated that into portraying Deepika in many avatars. The issue, by itself, is interesting and comprehensive. Come on, Femina give us something more to work with.

Deepika elle

In complete contrast, Deepika goes chic in this teal Louis Vuitton for the Elle cover. I like that it’s actually wearable. People won’t drag me to the circus if I do wear this out in public (not that I can afford an LV). The hair is short and wispy and the blue tones are in keeping with the monsoon but what is with that hospital curtain backdrop?