Boo!

It might be just another day at the office for Amitabh Bachchan.

Amitabh

But look what that does to his family!

Aaradhya

SMS – Subliminal messaging service

I can’t be the only person who is happy that Boogie Woogie is back on TV. We all had that one classmate who appeared on the show and that was his claim to fame and now, years later, still remains just that.

Madhuri, Juhi

Madhuri Dixit and Juhi Chawla showed their love for the show by dropping by and lage hath promoted their film too.

Now, I’m going to get into big trouble with the Universe (namely, Anuya) for saying this, but…JuhiseemswaycoolerthanMadhuri. I said it fast so I can later deny in God’s court. My reference is the Koffee with Karan episode. Juhi was all, ‘I’m so happy to be here. Aren’t you, Madhuri?’ and Mads was being, ‘Can Ranveer dance to my songs only?’

And even now, here, on the sets of Boo Boo Boogie Woogie Woo, Juhi looks like she’s having the most fun. Madhuri is smiling but is it reaching her eyes? And what are their stylists doing? Do they not understand the power of subliminal messages?

Madhuri is the good guy in Gulaab Gang so what is she doing dressed in a structured black blazer whereas Juhi, the villain, is in a flowy white number? Hold on, could this be a subliminal message? Wherein the makers are trying to tell us that the lines between good and evil are blurred and the one who we think is good might not really be so and that it’s all a matter of perception?

I think this has been one of my longer posts and a rather pointless one at that where I’m basically debating with myself. I really need to get out and meet some real life people.

IIFA-Q chale Amerika

Celebrities gathered for an IIFA press meet. The IFFAs will take place in Madhuri Dixit’s hometown of America.

Saif Ali Khan, Kareena Kapoor

Kareena Kapoor Khan: Really, Saif? I can’t believe I let you out of the house looking so overwhelmingly under dressed.

Saif Ali Khan, Kareena Kapoor1

Saif Ali Khan: You’re the one to talk. You have skunk skin on for a kurta.

IIFAKareena: Come back, Saifu. I was just joking, bro. Don’t take it so personally.

Saif: Personally? I’ll show you personal.

IFFA2Saif: Muah!

Kareena: Oh! Two can play this game, you know?

IIFA1Kareena: Muah!

Saif: Damn! I should leave the house badly dressed more often.

Anil Kapoor, Madhuri DixitMadhuri Dixit: Ah, yeh aaj kal ke bache. I don’t know what Saif’s problem is. That’s a lovely kurta with cute buttons on the shoulder.

Anil Kapoor: Hmm…

Madhuri: Is it just me or do we actually look younger than them? I mean, I know we had much better chemistry in Parinda and Beta than they ever had in Kurbaan.

Anil: Jhakaas!

Lunch Box

Karisma Kapoor shared some space with Dabbawallas at a food-related event. These Dabbawallas are not necessarily affiliated to the Aam Aadmi Party. Their actual dress code is a topi. They were terribly confused about what Karisma was wearing. So, true to their much touted management skills, they put it up for discussion.

Karisma Kapoor

Man not affiliated to Aam Aadmi Party 1 (MNATAAP): Kai ghatla hai tya bai ne? Dhoti?

MNATAAP 2: Skirt?

MNATAAP 3: Pant?

MNATAAP 4: With jean top.

MNATAAP 5: I’m not a big ‘fan’ of it.

MNATAAP 6: I’m soon going to be receiving a gift hamper from her so I better not comment. Instead, I’m just going to give her the side eye.

Karisma Kapoor1

MNATAAP 6: Aila! It’s even more confusing this close. I’m just going to smile through it all.

Roadkill

Alia Bhatt

There, there, Alia Bhatt.

Alia Bhatt, Imtiaz Ali

I get it. I too would gladly put a bullet to my head if my sense of style even remotely resembled Imtiaz Ali’s and I had to borrow Randeep Hooda’s trousers with no time to hem them in.

Alia, take solace in the fact that you have better hair than your director and can walk around town with little to no makeup.

Super bloggers hai hum

eStylista is doing a series featuring the coolest bloggers and they picked… wait for it… US!

We’ve written an exclusive piece for them that you will find nowhere else except here. That’s what ‘exclusive’ means, you know.

Read, share and slow clap so that tumhare saare paap dhul jaye.

JEET GAYEEEE

2_1392393877Deepika: Farhan

Farhan: Deepika

Deepika: Milkha

Farhan: Leela

Deepika: We’re rewriting the rules for cool lead character names, eh? HIGH-FIVE! DEATH TO RAHUL AND RHEA! 

Farhan: That’s cool… but. What happened?

Deepika: What do you mean, what happened?

Farhan: Did you have a date with Freddie Krueger?

Deepika: For the last time… I AM NOT DATING RANVEER SINGH.

Farhan: Your dress has a giant gaping slash in the middle.

Deepika: Yeh aaj kal ka fashion hain.

Farhan: And what’s up with the face, bro? Are you trying to look like Anushka Sharma? Even Anushka Sharma is trying to NOT look like Anushka Sharma at the mo.

Deepika: At least I am not swaddled in black like a baby in mourning.

Farhan: At least my boobs don’t look funny.

Deepika: That depends on which row you watched Bhaag Milkha Bhaag from.

Farhan: At least my hair isn’t pretending to be the Aam Aadmi Party symbol dipped in a bucket full of phenyl-wala paani.

Deepika: Shut up or I’ll bludgeon you to death with my trophy.

Farhan: I don’t think you should call Ranveer that.

(Props to anyone who can spot the K3G reference.)

We all Scream for Icecream

I love it when actresses promote healthy eating. And by healthy, I mean icecream, obviously.

154102_0

But what I NEVER understand, is why advertisers think that my primary criteria for picking food and beverages is because hot girls are doing it. It has never happened that I went to the baniya, decided I wanted a soft drink, and picked Slice because an image of Katrina Kaif fellating a mango convinced me that it was the right thing to do. If anything, it made me hate Slice even more, for having a stupid marketing team.

So I don’t understand why they think I’ll pick this icecream, horribly named Magnum. I will expect it to explode in my mouth and kill everyone around me, and since I’m not training to be a suicide bomber, this would not be ironic justice and thus not fun.

And now, coming to the dress… doesn’t it feel like her stylist went back to the Yeh Mera Dil green room, added some more heavy goldy fabric,  reproduced it with a “Tadaa!” and Kareena was all, whatevs, going to drop icecream on it anyway.

Or maybe it’s a subtle tribute to Game of Thrones (Season 4 on April 6th OMG OMG), in which case, bravo, stylist. Here, have a Magnum.

It’s not over

I thought we had recovered from Awards Season flu but evidently not. We had the Zee Cine Awards to go. I’m sure a bunch of the same people won the same awards and it was all same-same but different somehow.

Sonakshi Sinha in Gauri & Nainika

Sonakshi Sinha in Gauri and Nainika

That’s an attention seeking dress. It would have been just fine without the black hangy-things but no, it craved DRAMA and now it’s slightly drunk and has dirty danced all alone and every girl hates it and the guys are amused by it. I like the wicked Manish Arora headband, though.

Genelia D'Souza in a Rohit Bal anarkali

Genelia D’Souza in a Rohit Bal anarkali

She better have a great excuse for dressing up like this. Pregnancy, maybe?

Deepika Padukone wearing Naeem Khan

Deepika Padukone wearing Naeem Khan

She better have a great reason for that headpiece. Insanity?

Vaani Kapoor in a Varun Bahl sari

Vaani Kapoor in a Varun Bahl sari

A Facebook friend wore a similar look to Amit wedS Paayal ❤ 🙂 🙂 ❤

Priyanka Chopra in a Jade sari

Priyanka Chopra in a Jade sari

Is A-okay.

Adhuna with husband Farhan Akhtar. See what I did there

Adhuna with husband Farhan Akhtar. See what I did there?

Complete respect for Adhuna. I can only imagine the number of panties that get mailed to their home every day. And she seems like she’ll be all ‘meh’ about it. And then leave the house looking nothing but awesome and exactly how she wants to.

Yami Gautam in a Sonakshi Raaj fishtail gown

Yami Gautam in a Sonakshi Raaj fishtail gown

It’s a great colour and the bottom-half fits well but the bodice is too structured. Like her boobies have got their very own cage.

Amrita Rao wearing a Monica & Karishma creation

Amrita Rao wearing a Monica & Karishma creation

What is it with Amrita Rao and her stylist? They can never get it bang on. There’s always something amiss like a stale prawn biryani. It’s biryani and it’s prawns – a great combination – but they are stale. I’m not apologising for that analogy. It’s lunch time.

Priyanka Alva and Vivek Oberoi

Priyanka Alva and Vivek Oberoi

They are the anti Posh and Becks. They are Pinky and Vics from Jogeshwari.

With Javed Akhtar

With Javed Akhtar

Clearly, Shabana Azmi’s style inspiration is an African tribal chieftain.

Event shevent

An event took place/someone celebrated their birthday and people showed up. That’s as specific as it’s going to get.

With wife Malaika

With wife Malaika

Zayed Khan, belatedly, realised that the only way anyone would notice him is if he wore a florescent jacket and so he borrowed one from an Indian Railways employee. Either he has injured his leg or he has trained his pet python well.

In Burberry

In Burberry

Normally, I would balk at the idea of a trench coat worn in Bombay but lately our weather has been as predictable as Miley Cyrus so it’s good to see Kangana Ranaut dressed for the winter and the rains and even a hailstorm.

Shamita Shetty and Sophie Choudry

Shamita Shetty and Sophie Choudry

Sophie Choudry: Why do people keep inviting us to things?

Shamita Shetty: Who knows. The joke’s on them but.

Sophie Choudry: Yeah, I guess.